Peter Pan Parodies Wiki
Advertisement

Back at the ship, Captain McLeach was playing on a piano with Mr. Snoops dreamily watching and Kiara sitting on an inkwell, looking very cross.

"So, you accept defeat by Gil?" Kiara asked, not believing him.

"Yes, Miss Kiara, Captain Percival C. McLeach admits defeat. Tomorrow, I leave the island, never to return." McLeach said. Snoops was driking a glass of red wine he poured himself from the bottle.

Snoops heard that. "I'm glad to hear that, captain. Hic! I'll tell the crew and… Hic!"

But McLeach tripped him over, telling him, 'I didn't mean it.'

Then McLeach turned to Kiara. "And that's why I asked you over, me dear, to tell Gil I bear him no ill will." McLeach said, as he carried on playing the piano.

"Oh, Gil has his ideas to be sure. Bringing that Susan to the island, for instance. Dangerous business is that." McLeach said, as he was still playing the piano.

"Why, rumour has it that already she has come between you and Gil." McLeach said.

"She had?" Kiara sobbed, and she was about to cry.

"But what's this?" McLeach gasped, as he stopped playing, "Tears? Then it is true."

Snoops drank his second glass of wine, but then he stopped and put the wine bottle back in the piano case, only to get his finger stuck. He successfully pulled it out. "Oh, Snoops, the way of a man with a maid. Taking the best years of her life, and then, casting her aside! Like an old glove!"

Snoops began to cry, as well. "Ain't it a blooming… Hic! …shame?"

"But we mustn't judge Gil too harshly, my dear," McLeach said, as he handed Kiara his handkerchief. Kiara blew her nose on the handkerchief. "It's that Susan who is in love with him."

"That's right, but I love Roo 100%!" Kiara said, nodding her head.

"Mr. Snoops, we must save the lad from himself! But how?" McLeach asked. Snoops was still sobbing, "We've so little time, we sail in the morning." McLeach said, "Sail! That's it, Snoops!" He knocked Snoops to the ground. "We'll shanghai Susan!"

"Shanghai Susan, captain?" asked Snoops. Kiara was listening.

"Take her to sea with us. With her gone, Gil will soon forget this mad infatuation." said McLeach, "Come, Snoops. We must leave immediately, surround Gil's home…"

"But captain, we don't know where Gil Nexdor lives." Snoops said.

Captain McLeach put on his hat and gasped. "Great Scott, you're right, Snoops!' he exclaimed.

"I can help with that!" Kiara said.

"What's that, my dear?" asked McLeach.

Kiara flew to the map. "I'll lead you on this map to show you where Gil and Susan are."

"You could show us the way? Why I never thought of that. Take this down, Snoops." McLeach whispered to Snoops.

"Take this down, Snoops." Snoops whispered and then remembered he is Mr. Snoops. He took a few sips of wine and tipped it upside down, only for the wine to flow out. "Aye, aye, captain." He stopped the flow with his finger.

Kiara put some ink on her paws and begin to walk on the map. "Start at Pegleg Point." McLeach said.

"Start at Pegleg Point." Snoops repeated, as he wrote it down.

"Forty paces west of Blindman's Bluff."

"Blindman's Bluff."

"Yes, yes," McLeach said, as Kiara kept walking on the map with ink marks, showing them the way. "Hop, skip, and jump across Indian Python Creek. Then north by northeast one, two, three…" Kiara stopped walking.

McLeach was losing his patience. "WELL, GET ON WITH IT!" he shouted, banging the table with the candle holder.

"Err… continue, my dear." he smiled.

"Now wait a minute," Kiara said, as she flew up in front of McLeach's face. "If you do find it, you will harm Gil, got it?!"

"I must harm Gil?" McLeach asked, "Madam, Captain McLeach admits his word, not to lay a finger…"

"Or a hook!" Kiara said.

"Or a hook on Gil Nexdor."

"Fine." Kiara sighed. And then she drew an X on the old tree where Gil and the others were. "There they are!"

"Ah, Hangman's Tree! So that's the entrance to his hiding place!" McLeach grinned evilly, grabbed Kiara, and locked her in a lantern. "Thank you, my dear. You've been most helpful!" He laughed as he and Snoops walked away.

"Help!" Kiara screamed, "Let me out! Let me out!"

Advertisement